Condos and farms

I have so much to write but so little time to say it all, I’ll try my best to get it out but will probably fall short, that’s the problem with words, they can always fall short, they can always end up saying less then they need to say, however on occasion they can be just enough. That’s the toughest part though, figuring out how to get it all out as it comes time to let it all out.

Over the weekend we, being my girlfriend and I went looking for apartments and condo around the city. We went south then we went west then we went north, then we went south, then we went north again. Suffice to say it was a lot of driving and a lot of places to see and go. Its always interesting to see the difference that a few hundred dollars can do for what you can get.

We saw one place that was awfully crowded and filled with dirty students, I’d for sure never want to stay there, but at the time of school it would have been a way amazing place to stay, although the girls that were there were quite a mess. But that’s enough about them, it wasn’t even a consideration. Then we were south and we saw a place that looked like a great place but a horrible location, well not really horrible, but far away from the world we wished to live in. Its interesting to discover that there are places in the city where a car may almost be needed.

This search was a better personal experience as well, the places we went were cheaper and it was obviously obvious from what we saw. Its aways the way things go though, you see one thing, then you see another thing, then you see another thing and then you say wow. The first place I looked at was like the worst by a mile, but for only 250$ more there is something much better and butter located. Of course this makes sense from one point of view, but from another it could be totally different.

We found a couple of decent places and had to put them into order, its hard to do something like that when you have a small sample, but as it grows the views become much more obvious. As an aside, we went to a place far in the west, past liberty village (if you are from the city). We went to McDonald’s to get a snack, it was a bizarre place to be, at once I decided that I couldn’t live in that area. At McDonald’s there was a woman begging in side to the cashier and manager asking for change for tea or something. They ended up giving her a small fries and a paper bag, as she was putting the small fries which happens to be a small bag, she ended up dropping one on the floor, the dirty floor of a dirty part of the city. Anyhow, she picked it up and ate it.

When ever I see a person like that I feel empathy for them, or fear for myself, the thought that I could be a few mistakes away from that place terrifies me. I’ve got family and I’ve got friends, but what would happen if that were all to end, would I spin out of control like those people who end up on the street? That isn’t to say I fear that it will happen or could happen, but the fear is something that can be helpful in motivating me. Or as something else, an insight into reality? Into something else that is seen somewhere else.

After searching for condos and getting some sleep we had breakfast and parted ways.

I drove to the farm and after seeing the renovations me any my dad drove out to the back of the field to bury a placenta, I know it sounds bad and it is pretty disgusting to discuss. Of course it wasn’t from a person or anything like that, it was from a horse that had given birth in the barn. But after we dug the hole and put a stone over it I thought to myself and then said ‘the thought of the placenta is worse then the actual placenta’ which was totally true. We then covered the rest of the hole and the process was done.

We drove around the massive lot in a gator as its called, the neighbour is trying to steal some of the land by cutting across the line, hes done a decent steal this time, his lot has grown. I remarked, I wonder what he will plant this year, last year it was wheat and it was soybeans before that. I remember a couple of years ago I was working at the farm, doing farm work, which is to say it was serious work, heavy work, hard work.

After meeting with everyone it was time to leave, I left with my step sister, we were talking about writing and books and how the future will be science fiction. I showed my obsession with sci-fi by saying that we will have computers in our heads in the future. She said she wouldn’t want / would get that stuff done. I figured it was already done, it was already the case, but I didn’t push that idea to much.

So over the whole experience I had lots of experiences that changed my perspective on the way things are and the way things can be. That’s when I realized that all those thoughts in my head were probably wrong and that there was probably something altogether different going on there.

Any how, later tonight I went for a walk and all those experiences turned into a constant inflow of insights, although all different insights and all different ideas, probably nothing at all related to what the experiences of the weekend were. But that is sort of the point, life is what happens when you’re not paying attention, and all the learning happens after the fact.

I feel that I have a new vision on what the future and the rest of the world can bring, after all, its controllable in the sense that I can’t really know what I am or what I am doing, so then all this stuff that happens without is something that is different from whats happening within, and that isn’t so much something that can be know.

Or is it?

Jump to the condo.

Ready my short story: Korean Affair

What is the plot line?

There is always a question about how something should be. We always expect things to turn out one way but they never turn out that way, they often become something else. This is the whole point of life I suppose.

Haha, thats pretty funny, coming from a guy like me. Who am i to say anything about the way things should be, how do i even have a clue about the way things are? Im stuck in my head like everyone else and we are all trying to figure it out. Like its something that could be figured out, like seriously. THink of it this way, how can i know that when i say something you hear it and interpret it to mean something else. That is what always happens, but we never really let it just be.

Once i was walking down the street and I saw a homeless guy, and i thought is he really homeless? I feel bad for them, but i don’t really know what to think about them? Its sad that someone would have to resort to begging on the street. Its even worse to think that we are all in the same game. Anyhow, so this guy. He lives on the street, but he has nice shoes, and decent cloths. This after passing him there was another person who seemed to be on the street too, but she said ‘so im changing apartments again, to a two bedroom.’

So there as i was interjecting with something irrelevant to my cause i come back to the point of what i started to say in the first place.

What is the plot? How can i have any clue what the trick of the law will be in my favour, it is always so strange to think that there was a way thought i though my life would be.

This is a hyperreality story about life in the matrix.

How can i know what to do when i dont know what is happening in the moment?  So what is the plot line and that is a good question to ask, that was actually the question i was just asking myself for the last four hours, I was thinking about all the things that i need to do and all the things that i have to do… For i have always thought that i needed to do things a certain way, that i needed to win a certain prize, but its not the prize like what we usually think about it, i sort of think that my destiny, which I believe exits is to be the way it suppose to be and we will rejoice.

Never before have I had all the experience that I have right now, never before have i been in the situation that i am in right now. THats also not to say something else all together.

So the plot is that the plot is up to me, but also up to luck and also up to faite or something other then that but meaning the same thing. I am about to embark on a new life, and it will be an exciting challenge and change to the way I see things now. The goal or the plot of this first story is that journey.

Long ago when I first started this project I called it ‘my walk’, that was years ago and probably still exits if you know where to look. Then after that there was this idea that I had and I wanted to put it in the same place as this one is right now. THen i realized that there was something new that I needed to do, and that that new thing was what I had started doing in the beginning.

So like that we get back to a start or at least back to a place that makes sense relative to the rest of the things that are on the plate for now. Anyhow, the plot is to be determined, but it is determined by hard work.

In the interlude between the start of this post and the end I’ve racked in almost 3 hours of work, or product development. I know that with all this work something will take and we could be making a killing in some sort of time. Well thats what I hope for and thats what I got to believe, for believing is the first step in doing.

Doing, thats pretty fun. Doing, thats pretty important. Doing, thats all that matters. Doing, thats how we win. Doing, thats basically the only choice.

After reading that paragraph I get the sense that this might seem to be starting to sound like something else, and that something else is a self help book, or a book of personal development or something like that. Its odd to think that something that is a story about the way someone else did something is also a look at the events in a way that it can help someone else. Thats sort of what I want, well thats sort of what I have always been looking for. They say money is the root of all evil, but I say not doing is just as likely the root of all evil.

Of course following that previous statment to its logical conclusion, we probably don’t really want to world to be filled with people doing what ever it is that they wanted to do. I guess I have some faith in society, it seems to me that given the opportunity most people will try to do the right thing. But then again that assuming everyone had equal opportunity, but that can be true either.

Thats the thing with all of this, we can see it one way and hope for it to be a way, or we can know it will be that way and work towards what it needs to be. That means doing what needs to be done to get to where you want to go.

The other day I was walking towards Union Station, looking up at a condo building the top floor gleamed of greatness and I thought at that moment ‘thats where I want to live.’ So thats the plot of this story, this ‘first story’ will follow me though the phase of  move onto the next step of my life and acquiring that pent house condo.

Ready my short story: Korean Affair

I’m living in a science fiction movie!

It all started the other day, well it wasn’t really the other day it was a day way before that and even then it was something else all together and probably quiet a while before that.

Today as I was walking do the street I noticed that I could read without really paying attention to my walking, it was sort of a surreal experience in that it wasn’t what I expected it would be, it was easy to read and walk and i’d walked the street many times before and there wasn’t much to take account of.  Face buried in a book, thats something different, actually a woman really said that to me. She was so impressed that I was reading a book, she said ‘you don’t see that very often, people are always looking at their phones.’

The city is a different place, people there are all the same, but different then those who are in other places. BUt thats the way it always is, people are always different depending on where they are from, and the thats probably because of the places that they come from.

The night was dark, i was sitting back, closing my eyes and trying to listen to the music, the music was on a layer beyond what I could see, but close to what I could visualize. THe sounds were flowing and the beats were affecting my consciousness. My eyes closed, sight in my head. The voice of the out side world called me in, but the outside world was actually in side, it was on the table before which I sat. The light and sound came from the same place, and that place was calling my name… ‘come closer it said’.

Come closer, come farther, the things in there come from all over the world…. or so they say, they come from somewhere else, but, but yes, you can touch that button and click those keys and then you are somewhere else…. I always wondered if I was somewhere else… I must have been, for I was here, in my old bed room, which now contains a desk and is what I call any office.

But what is an office other then the place where I sit. THe place where I type away because that is the thing that I have determined I need to do. That is also the place that calls me in, with information from around the world and ideas from apparent other people…. the people of the internet, or more accurately in these times, the internet.

Sometimes I wonder if there is someone else out there in that internet, I ride a train every morning and wonder if the people around me are real. FOr the most part mostly no one talks, and talking is weird, I suppose I could talk to a stranger beside me and ask if the sky is really blue, but that doesn’t seem appropriate.  None of it seems like it could be real, all these people are asleep, or on there phones or in there books or on some other digital device.

My friend told me the other day that the sky wasn’t blue and that he couldn’t understand how people could ride the train, it seems so boring and soul crushing…. ok that last part are my words, but I bet they are his sentiments exactly. He also remarked ‘but now with smart phones, it probably more bearable, I could watch my videos and read news.’

These devices are the worst, they probably make life so much worse….. they pull us in and we become one with them. THey are ours and we are theres, but how can that be? They are devices and we own them, not the other way around, right?

But how is this a science fiction novel? like really, this is just normal life for normal people, doing the same things as before and doing what they know to do. Thats how I see it at least, but I hardly know what to see and what there is to see, I have my own lies to deal with.

The sea of technology flows around me, I am pulled in. My life revolves around computers, I used to criticism my mom for watching so much TV, but at least she watches TV instead of being on the computer all day, but I guess they are both just as bad. My obsession takes of my time, and so does hers, but one day this obsession will pay the bills and I’ll have those greener pastures.

Not but really, we all seem to be pulled into these things, these devices and they take up our minds and they take up our spaces and they take up our souls, they are us and we are them, we become one in the same.

In the deepest darkest corners of Spadina there are places were crazy things happen, people join together in dark rooms and they all stair at screens, big screens, up against their faces and they watch, they watch as their sudo soles wither aways as a false 3d icon of themselves. And their a fantasy was lived out, digitally  in a digital world, but digital is just another word for fake or real if we take it to its logical conclusion.

The world has become digital and so have I, my life is in screens and screens are in my life, it doesn’t matter much what type of screen it is or what type of life it is, it is all online its all jacked in and its all part of the machine. I don’t want to be a part of the machine, I try to resist, but at the same time being part of the machine is what can get me out of the machine, or so I hope.

At work the screens are blasting and they are showing various things that change in the flick of a second, they then change back to something else, its hard to know what I’m looking at, its hard to what to do but it will all happen soon.

 

Ready my short story: Korean Affair

what would i do?

I would do everything if i could do what ever there was to do, but that is to hard, for that would mean i need to do everything and i cant do everything, even if i really tried. But i might be able to do everything that I really really want to do, that can be it.

But how do we define what it is that we want to do, how is it that we say what we want to say while saying what we mean. Words are important, but often they need context.

If we can give ‘words’ a context then we can give them a place to stand, so that they are remembered and placed.

But what if we do this and it turns out that people don’t want to leave there conversations off to chance. Like the places they are, that isn’t chance, that is space and time, things that can be recorded and quantified.

If we give a context to the things that we shared then we could create more meaningful connections between the things that we do and the people that we see.

Where I live has a lot to do with the people that I see and interact with, that has a lot to do with something else too, and that its making sense of those connections. In one regard you can see this as an exploration into friendship.

If we wanted to know why we were a part of some group we would want to know how we got there. Well maybe we wouldn’t really want to know how we got there, but maybe there is a reason to track it for ourselves.

Different people bring different connections and different contexts to different conversations, last night I meet with some old friends who I haven’t seen in years, the context has been lost, but the connection can still persist.

So what would I do, well its hard to say. How can I ever really know what there is for me to see, maybe I can see that there is something totally different out there in the world then what we see on these screens. So when it comes to knowing what I would do….. I would try to make the world out side look like the world of the matrix, and knowing the matrix was the real world and the real world was the matrix, I would get confused.

I would make the world a better place, but of course that is to say what everyone else always says when they want do something.

——————

The men woman and children of this new world lived in there screens, this is where they saw what there was to see and to know what there is to want.  But what they could really want, wasn’t something that they could have.

In the recently evacuated suburbs some people still lived, but they were a new type of people, they needed agility and insight into the world of computers, the computers were there best weapon against the evils that they thought they were looking out to fight.

But the reality was something all together different, some communities had been rumoured to be bio-spheres of food. Micro-communities could grow up pretty quickly as the ease of creation became easier within areas of almost perfect growing conditions. These area were mostly in temperate climates with ground water supplies. Ground water became the ultimate supply, it was hard to collect water above the ground, as the carbon accumulation has created absurd conditions.

Back in the city water was shipped in and distributed on a first come first server bases, this usually meant you had to rush unless you had order from a supplier, but people couldn’t afford this. But clubs and restaurants always had water, their suppliers bypassed everyone else.

People were more connected then ever before, they didn’t event need to drive there cars anymore, they had long since been automated and ‘jacking in’ could occur with ease. People didn’t even know what they were doing anymore, they were often unlikely aware and always driven into there devices.

Computers could be found in the out skirts of reality, or in the business towers in the city, but not very much anywhere out there. Programming has become a thing of the past, automation had taken the imaginations out of everything anyways. Meals seemed to be cut from a post of tera-foam, they were always perfectly shaped and almost unnatural in every way. But at most that is what you could get, unless you had a horse, or a million dollars to travel to koby or paris.

The automated life made most people zombies of there own minds, they would wander the streets not looking around, not being a part of what was happening ‘out there’. This was there world, it was something different all together, digital became real and real became digital. People didn’t really eat the tera-foam they swallowed it, it was pre -chewed and ready for consumption. There were apps for dates anyways, why have a real meal when you can have one online.

There were always those who tried to reach out and find the farms, but they were few and far between and most often didn’t come back…. Maybe they found there farms, but it was hard to know. Getting traveling papers was hard enough.

An underground society had developed, they had some how occupied different regions almost over night. Government regulations would forclose on a property, the original tenants removed the building would be labeled condemned, two weeks later apartments would be filled with pseudo-squatters.

There was never really an all out war either, it was just an insurmountable number of battles, but even what where those, people never look out side anyways, they could have just been told what they were told and lived in a state of ease without even having to try.

Technology had brought them a world they had all hoped would be better but it turned out to be something all together different.

 

Ready my short story: Korean Affair

A collection of ideas that are quick to read